The Prologue is Ending

Writing a blog has always been a goal of mine. I start out really strong, posting three or four times consistently, then I tend to teeter off and look back at it two years later and shake my head at my unfortunate attempts to be deep and personable with the faceless billions on the internet.

However, this blog is for my personal sanity. I have struggled over the past year and a half to discover something I am truly passionate for. My dreams of graduating with the rest of my friends is slowly dwindling into a dream, while my personal life has started to uproot itself and change. I do not do change well.

I was talking to a friend recently, who has life for the next few years more or less figured out. She got into one of the top programs in the country for her field and I couldn't be prouder to call myself her friend. I'm lucky to be in the company of someone so accomplished, even if she doesn't realize it. I struggle however. I want to be supportive. I want to be happy. I want to smile and mean it.

Somedays, it's hard to do that.

Something changes in you when you realize that life as you know it is coming to an end. I'm not talking about going off to college. Yes, high school and college are two very different atmospheres and the transition is not to be taken lightly, but this change I feel coming is even more imminent then the one I felt back in September 2010, the night before I moved into my freshman dorm.

All I have known for the past 22 years, 2 months and some-odd days of my life is this: I wake up, eat oatmeal, go to school, do something productive in the afternoon, eat dinner, sleep. Rinse. Repeat as necessary. School has been my constant rock in the physical, natural world, as is for most people in America. School is the thing that, though we may not be all excellent at, we all know how to do.

Working. Doing a job. Being an adult who pays actual bills. Being 100-and-10% responsible for every detail in my life, rent, cable, phone, car, food, movies, career... That is something I know theoretically about, but actually have no idea how to grasp.

I guess you could say that almost graduating undergraduate is starting the "working progress" phase of my life. School has been the forward/prologue, now it's time to start the actual chapters of my life.

Thus, the blog comes into play. Hopefully writing down my mishaps through life, my successes (God, I hope I have lots of those), my failures (lets keep this to a dull minimum please; thnx Jesus) and my weird encounters with every day people, friends and family will lead to some sort of revelation down the road.

If not, maybe someone will read this and get a laugh or two out of my life.